神様からのメッセージ
人生の転機って、誰にも何度かあると思うけど、僕の場合は人に言われた言葉がそれだね。
一番最初は5歳の時。はじめて幼稚園でSLの絵を描いて持ち帰ったら母親が「この絵はうまい！」って。「えーっ？」ってびっくりするぐらい相当オーバーに褒めてくれた。その瞬間、自分は絵が上手いんだって100%思い込んだ。これってすごいことで、上手いと思うから調子に乗ってたくさん描くように。たくさん描けばそれなりに出来るようになるので、さらに勘違いするという循環に。スポーツだってそうで、練習量が多ければそれなりのところには行けるよね。この状態は中学生ぐらいまで続いたけど、さすがに高校生になると「上には上がいる」を認識するようになって。だからその程度なんだよ。大人になってよく「才能のある人はいいよね」なんて言われるけど、僕の場合はそんなんじゃない。誰だって出来るぐらいのことを少し多めにやっただけ。でもそれは母の言葉ではじまったので感謝しかないね。
次の転機は33歳の時。10年勤めた広告代理店から独立して3年目のこと。当時は叔母でジャズシンガーでもある黒岩静枝が所有する事務所の一室を借りてオフィスにしていた。業界的にも忙しい時期だったので毎日仕事に追われていたんだけれど、あるときふとやって来た叔母が「あんた、忙しくしていてなによりだけど、会社にいるときとたいして変わらないんじゃないのかい？自分のやりたいこと、もっとアーティスティックなことをするために独立したんじゃないのかい？」と。これには目からうろこ状態で、しっかり我に返らせてもらった。そして今まではやったことのない、売上げにもならない自主制作をはじめることにした。そうやって作ったポスターが海外のコンペで入選したりして、その後幅が広がっていったんだけれど、叔母のひと言がなかったらきっと違っていたと思う。そんな叔母にも感謝。
3つめは42歳あたり。そのころは仕事で毎日遅かったことに加えて、札幌ADCというクリエイターが集まる団体を作って活動をしていたから、夜のミーティングもそれなりに多いし、そのあとメンバーたちと飲みに行ったりでなかなか早く家に帰るという感じじゃなくて。まだ次女も小さくて妻も疲れてた時期だと思う。そんなころに妻にこう言われた。「何のために結婚したわけ？ 結婚って家庭を成長させるためじゃないの？」。この家庭を成長させるっていうのは心に響いたね。家庭を守るとか大事にするっていうのはよくあるけど、成長させるって発想はなかったから。具体的に何をもって成長というのかは今だにわからないけど、この言葉が上昇志向の好きな僕をくすぐったのは間違いない。妻の作戦勝ち。
これらの言葉たちは、母や叔母や妻を通して「こうすればうまくいくよ」と神様が教えてくれたような気がする。普段の会話と違って自分が受けた衝撃があまりに大きいので、はっきりわかる。「これはお告げだ」って。さすがに5歳の時はそこまで意味づけできてないけど、感覚は同じだったね。叔母や妻の言葉は、ある意味批判の意味合いもあるので最初カチンときた。いつもだとイラついて終わりそうなものだけど、なるほどなって納得のほうが大きくなっていったときに、なんだか背筋がぞくぞくするように感じたのは、大いなる何か、サムシンググレートからのメッセージだったからかな。これってただのスピリチュアル好きか。笑
Message from god
I think everyone has several turning points in their lives, but for me it was the words someone said to me.
The first time was when I was 5 years old. When I first drew a picture of SL in kindergarten and brought it home, her mother said, “This picture is great!” He praised me so much that I was surprised and said, “Huh?” At that moment, I 100% believed that I was good at drawing. This is amazing, and I think I’m good at it, so I’ll get on board and draw a lot. The more I draw, the more I get good at it, which leads to even more misunderstandings. The same goes for sports; if you practice a lot, you can get to a certain level. This situation continued until I was in middle school, but by the time I got to high school, I started to realize that there was a higher level. So that’s about it. Growing up, I’m often told that “talented people are great,” but that’s not the case for me. I just did a little more than anyone could have done. But it started with my mother’s words, so I can only be grateful.
The next turning point was when I was 33 years old. It’s been 3 years since I became independent from an advertising agency where I worked for 10 years. At the time, I rented a room in the office owned by her aunt, Shizue Kuroiwa, who is also a jazz singer, and used it as my office. It was a busy time in the industry, so I was busy with work every day, but one day my aunt suddenly came over and said, ”Well, you’ve been busy, but isn’t it much the same as when you’re at the office?” “Didn’t you decide to become independent to do what you wanted to do, something more artistic?” This was eye-opening and brought her back to her senses. Then, I decided to start independent production, something I had never done before and that would not lead to sales. The posters I made in this way were selected for competitions overseas, and the scope of my work expanded after that, but I think it would have been different if it hadn’t been for her aunt’s words. I am also grateful to my aunt.
The third one is around the age of 42. At that time, in addition to being late every day due to work, I was working with an organization called Sapporo ADC, which brought together creators, so I had quite a few evening meetings, and then I went out for drinks with the members, so I got home early. It’s not like I’m going back to. I think it was at a time when my second daughter was still young and her wife was tired too. Around that time, my wife said this to me. She said, ”Why did you get married? Isn’t marriage meant to grow your family?” The idea of growing this family resonated with me. I often talk about protecting and taking care of my family, but I never thought about helping them grow. I still don’t know exactly what growth means, but this word definitely tickled my upwardly mobile self. My wife’s strategy won.
I feel like these words were taught to me by God through my mother, aunt, and wife, saying, ”If you do this, things will work out.” The impact I received was so great that I could clearly see it, unlike a normal conversation. “This is a message,” he said. Admittedly, when I was 5 years old, I didn’t really attach much meaning to it, but the feeling was the same. My aunt’s and wife’s words resonated with me at first because they had the meaning of criticism in a sense. Normally I’d end up feeling irritated, but when I got to the point where I was more and more convinced, I felt a shiver run down my spine, probably because it was a message from something great, something great. Is this just a spiritual thing? lol